Restoring the Roar

On September 24, 2013 I attended a presentation titled “Restoring the Roar” about how to deal with burn out on the job, mostly concerning the medical field.  However, I felt it covered all walks in life.  The information was derived from the “The Duke Resilience Mini Course” and the website is http://biit.ly/restoretheroar. The first questions asked the presenter asked the audience were: Do you skip meals;  do you get less than five hours of sleep a night; and do you drink too much coffee.  If anyone in the audience experienced three or more nights with less than five hours of sleep, they are 2 times likely to die of heart disease.  It was recommended that we either get three hours of sleep or five or more.  Getting only four hours of sleep impairs our REM sleep. 

Our brains interpret prolonged fatigue as a stressor, releasing additional glucocoticoids.  Humans are the only life form that deprives themselves of sleep.  We were are deprived of sleep we are risk to become less resilient and there may be some safety issues. 

Why do we need sleep? For memory consolidation, emotional regulation, and to recharge our batteries.  We need to repair and rejuvenate.  With  sleep deprivation, there is a reduction in our ability to form new memories in humans.  Negative memories are most resilient to fatigue, so you become tired and grumpy.  The presenter asked the audience if they were ever bone tired but could not fall asleep when their head hit the pillow.  Blue light is to blame for this and blue light blocker glasses can be purchased for a low price.  The presenter suggested that everyone get at least 10 to 15 minutes of natural light in afternoon.  We will 75% more sleep if we exercise in the morning. 

Resilience, according to Michael Ungar, defines resilience as coming from our genes at 30% and the rest is how we were raised, our environments. Resilience involves: Self-Awareness; Relationships; Mindfulness; Self-Care; and Purpose. The presenter asked if any of us have ever worked for an asshole.  He said burn out is the opposite of resilience.  He suggested that we obtain “The No Asshole Rule” and explore the website www.despair.com.  When we are emotionally exhausted we are just a step away from depression. 

                The brain represents 2% of our body weight, it consists of 20% oxygen, 20-30% kcals, and more neurons than stars in the galaxy.  The prefrontal cortex is busier in women than it is with men.  This portion of our brain is associated with logic, reason, our ability to regulate our emotions and to act socially appropriate.  If you can google with your phone, technology is to readily available. In other words people are too available to the world and vice versa.  Need to turn off all technology and behave as if we are an island for 30 to 90 minutes a day to restore our prefrontal cortex.  If we have cognitive vulnerability, we are more susceptible to depression. Depression can be contagious.  There is a prevalence and impact of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and burn out syndrome concerning nurses.  Burn out bandaids can consist of spending time with a spouse, other social support, positive learning environments, holding satisfactory conversations, ones in which they are mutual exchanges, control over days off, and quality of working relationships. 

                “The negative screams at you, but the positives only whispers.” Barbara Fredrickson.

                We can counteract the negative through loving kindness meditation.  Positive emotions widens options and negative emotions narrows our options. 

Low performance 1:1

Medium performance 2:1

High performance 6:1

Ratio of positive to negative emotional experiences. 

                It was suggested that we obtain the book “Positivity Book.”  It was recommended that we share three things that went well and what could be better.  Doing a kindness produces the single most reliable momentary increase in well-being of any exercise that has been tested.  It was recommended to find one wholly unexpected kind thing to do tomorrow and just do it.  Notice what happens to your mood. 

                “No one misbehaves out of strength….” Ellen Langer, Ph.D.

                Having friends is a bigger predictor of mortality than being a smoker.  Recipe for longevity: no smoking; lots of friends.  (Holt-Lunstadt J. Smith)  Do you have a 4:00a.m. friend?  Is there someone in your life you would feel comfortable phoning at 4:00 a.m. in the morning to tell your troubles to?  If so, you are likely to live longer.  (George Vallant)  The presenter warned about the toxicity of insincerity. 

                The audience practiced active constructive responding which involved: maintain eye contact; smile/touch if appropriate/laugh; overdo praise; concentrate; utilize constructive responses.  (Martin E.P. Seligman) Another resource was recommended “Flourish.”  Again, the presenter recommended that the audience write down three things that have gone well. 

 

 

 

Enlightened Perspective

Enlightened Perspective


By Andy Rooney

I’ve learned that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I’ve learned that when you’re in love, it shows.

I’ve learned that just one person saying to me, “You’ve made my day!” makes my day.

I’ve learned that having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned that being kind is more important than being right.

I’ve learned that you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I’ve learned that I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

I’ve learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with. 

I’ve learned that sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I’ve learned that simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper.  The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for. 

I’ve learned that money doesn’t buy class.

I’ve learned that it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I’ve learned that to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I’ve learned that when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I’ve learned that love, not time, heals all wounds.

I’ve learned that the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I’ve learned that everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I’ve learned that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I’ve learned that life is tough, but I’m tougher.

I’ve learned that opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I’ve learned that when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I’ve learned that I wish I could have told my  Dad that I love him one more time before she passed away.

I’ve learned that a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I’ve learned that when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.

I’ve learned that everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.

I’ve learned that the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

 

Sister Cities: Ryuo-Cho, Japan and Sault Ste. Marie, MI

                Both Sault Ste. Marie, MI and Ryuo-Cho are considered to be sister cities as a result of an agreement between both cities.  During a very interesting presentation on September 11, 2013, the Lake Superior Elders were given a vast amount of information about Ryuo-Cho.  Ryuo-Cho, a small city in Japan with approximately 13,000 people, participates in a middle school student exchange with Sault Ste. Marie, MI.  Odd years city representatives from Sault Ste. Marie visit Ryuo-Cho and on even years representatives from Ryuo-Cho visit Sault Ste. Marie, MI.  The people in Japan appear to be extremely polite and civil and they are open to multiple religions. The presenter saw a small child, approximately five years of age, walking down the busy streets in Kyoko, the main city in Japan, without an adult in attendance of the child.  She pointed to the child and asked “where are the child’s parents?” and was told “this is a safe society. Adults look out for all the children.”  Are we missing important elements in this country? 

Where should I start, perhaps with the most interesting detail I observed during the presentation.  We were shown a clip of deer roaming the streets amongst people, not afraid of people.  The Deer of Nara is an area in Japan that honors white tail deer.  According to folklore, in the past there was a sacred man who arrived on a white tail deer.  I will probably look into this a little more at a later date. 

Zero tolerance exists concerning driving and drinking in Japan.  You cannot have any amount of alcohol no matter how small the amount and drive legally.  How much is too much?  The presenter went to a place that served alcohol, a karaoke place, and there needed to be a designated driver present.  They take their karaoke seriously and everyone who was present in the place that served as a karaoke bar, which was the front room of a person’s home, had to sing karaoke.  Space is a precious commodity in Japan so no space is wasted.  The presenter thought the family she stayed with had water front property; but the water was a rice field in their backyard.  The homes are smaller and the streets are very narrow. 

While the presenter was in Japan she stayed with a Japanese family, a retired couple.  One night he played a shamisen, a stringed instrument.  A shamisen has a neck about the size of a guitar with no frets and only three strings.  It reminded me of a sweet stick, an antique stringed instrument in the US.  Her host sang Japanese songs and appeared to be very proud of his talent.  He plays in a band and is enjoying his retirement immensely. 

In Higashiomi a giant kite ceremony is held annually.  There was a huge kite flown and the crowd is cheering when the kite is up and there was booing when the kite fell to the ground.  Another attempt was made to fly the first kite. Lots of kites were flown at this festival. 

The presenter viewed a traditional wedding ceremony.  The bride wore a traditional head dress which was worn to hide her horns until after she is married.  I thought this concept was funny.  However, do the men wear a head dress also?

Food is considered an art form and the food is usually served in an elegant manner.  The presenter was served a savory Okonomiyaki pancake which is made with different combinations of meat and other ingredients.  Shabu shabu is served with vegetables and meat.  Water is boiling and a very slim slice of beef or another meat is put into the water quickly for a few seconds.  Shabu shabu is considered a high end dish. They went to a sushi bar and the food was served on a conveyor belt. 

The presenter visited the biggest seafood market in the world, The Tsukiji Fish Market.  Only 60 people at a time are allowed to enter the market and shop at one time.  They needed to arrive at 3:00 a.m. to get a spot at the market.   Two thousand tons of seafood goes through the market each day.  Prices of a large tuna can run as high as $100,000. 

The presenter told us about the high tech toilet system in Japan.  There are lights to indicate if someone is in a stall at public restrooms.  Buttons exist to flush and other qualities of the toilet such as cleansing features. 

The school  day at Ryuo-Cho runs from 8:25a.m. to 4:00p.m. for the high school students and perhaps the younger students also.  There were 337 students and 23 teachers at the high school level. One of the middle school children was wearing a Soo Locks t-shirt when the presenter was visiting the middle school.  The Superintendent of the School is also a part of the city government.  Interesting.  Under the same management are the nursing homes also.  So all ages are covered by one form of government?  That may be an efficient way of doing things. 

The presenter and the others who traveled from Sault Ste. Marie to Ryuo-Cho were given instruction in flower arranging, which is referred to as Ikebuna.  The Japanese consider flower arranging to be a scientific process.  They were also taught calligraphy which when you look at the written Japanese language it does look like a form of calligraphy.

The presenter visited many sacred places such as the “The Golden Pavilion.”  This structure was coated with gold leaf which is believed to protect against negative thoughts.  It was burned down in 1950 and rebuilt in 1955.  She caught a rare glimpse of Mt. Fuji.  The Hikoni Castle was constructed during the 1600s and served as a military base in the past.  She enjoyed riding the Bullet Train and the other amenities and experiences except the bed she slept in which consisted of a thick covering on the floor.  At first it was comfortable and then she felt all her bones ache.  The food itself was an experience in itself and the people were extremely friendly and accommodating.   

 

 

 

Combating Writing Frustration

 

 

By Sharon Brunner 

I have been writing a book, which has had several deadlines.  The manuscript has been given to an editor and she went over it with a fine tooth comb.  However, since the time I received it back from the editor with revision suggestions, I have made additional revisions beyond what the editor suggested.  My editor also made recommendations concerning the content of my manuscript.  So it was back to the drawing board for additional research.  I kept reminding myself that with everything I do I am closer to achieving my goal, which is the completion of my book. 

Set your work aside for at least two weeks before picking it up again.  Looking at your work with fresh eyes is best.  Read your work out loud to yourself and/or others.  Have another person review your work and request honest feedback.  This is when you need to grow thick skin.  Oftentimes, you will only hear the things that need to be changed and improved and not the good things associated with your work.  It is important to stress the need to be open and receptive to comments.  Your written work has become a part of you, you have fed and nourished it and it’s difficult to let it go. 

Get your thoughts down.  It doesn’t have to be good, it has to be written. Consider your written work a child with whom you have done the best job possible with raising, and now it’s time to send your child out into the world, ready or not.  That’s how it may feel to present your work to anyone.  Nobody is perfect and everyone comes from different worldviews and viewpoints.  The latter is important to understand where the different comments may come from and having others not agreeing with what you have written.  Keep an open mind with hearing and reading all comments.  The comments may be valid and should be considered.  Also keep in mind this is your work so take what you need and leave the rest.  

Other important points to consider, does your written work flow smoothly, is it believable, and does it make sense.  Pick up your writing project and read it like it is the first time you are reading it and pretend it’s someone else’s. Remove yourself completely from any ownership you may have. I was surprised when I did this and discovered how many additional edits I needed to make. The last point I want to make is to make sure you give yourself praise.  It is vital to the entire process that you remind yourself writing is a process from the conception of your writing ideas to completion.  Every step is an important part of the writing process and every step you take gets you closer to achieving your goals. 

The Evil Eye

 

Throughout history the evil eye was known to be able to cause injury or bad luck for the person at whom it is directed usually for reasons involving envy or distain.  The evil eye is given to others who remain unaware; however, all of a sudden their luck changes.  When I was listening to a story told by Greek woman she described a scene in which her aunt gave someone the evil eye and whenever that person stated that they wished for something to happen, the opposite happened such as wanting to travel somewhere by car and the car would break down.  The concept of the evil eye was generally accepted belief among many Mediterranean and Asian tribes and cultural groups.  Charms and decorations featuring the eye appear often across Turkey, Iran, Afghanistan and have become a popular souvenir for tourists visiting these areas.

It is a belief that some people can bequeath a curse on victims by extending a wicked gaze of their magical eye onto their adversaries.  The most common reason for the evil eye to be bestowed is envy in which the envious person casts the evil eye unintentionally or intentionally.  A typical target of the evil eye may be young children who are receiving admiration especially from a childless woman. The effects on the victims vary.  Some people believe the evil eye may cause disease, wasting, or even untimely death.  A person, usually not malevolent in any way, can harm adults, children, livestock, or possessions, simply by gazing at them with envy.  The gaze of the coveted item remained focused for too long.

Ancient sources revealed that beliefs in the evil eye existed during the Plato’s time.  During the Greco-Roman period scientific explanations stated that the eyes were the chief source of the deadly rays that were supposed to spring up like poisoned darts from the inner recesses of a person possessing the evil eye.  During the Roman days not only individuals were considered to possess the evil eye; however, it was believed that entire tribes such as the Pontus and Scythia were considered to possess these abilities. 

Where light colored eyes are relatively rare, these individuals are thought to be able to bestow the curse, intentionally or unintentionally.  In Greece and Turkey amulets against the evil eye take the form of blue eyes, and in the painting by John Phillip, it was witnessed the culture clash experienced by a woman who suspects that the artist’s gaze implies that he is looking at her  with the evil eye.  A blue or green eye can also be found on some forms of the hamsa which means five referring  to the fingers on a hand for the Jewish culture and the Hand of Fatima is utilized in the Muslim culture.  Concerning the Islam religion, only God can protect for the evil eye. 

Belief in the evil eye was found in Islamic doctrine.  Bona Fide practices for warding off the harmful effects of evil eye is commonly practiced by the Muslims.  Concerning admiration of a child’s beauty it is customary to say that “God has willed it” to protect the child.  A multitude of beliefs about the evil eye were found in other religions, typically consisting of the use of amulets or talismans as a means of protection.