Sunday, June 5, 2016

You Know You're a Yooper When.....

1.   A trip to the islands means a trip to Mackinac and Bois Blanc.
2.   You use the Yooper Rule of Apostrophes: dinty = didn't he; shounta = shouldn't have; and wounta = wouldn't have. Gotta love the U.P. Language!
3.   The word "Eh" seems to find its way onto the end of every sentence.
4.   You leave you beers outside to get cold.
5.   You break something and then fix it with duct tape.
6.   You drive to Traverse City to tan on the beaches.
7.   You know what they grow in dat dere Garden Peninsula.
8.   You've ever had a snow day after Mother's Day.
9.   Your county spends more time and money on the snowmobile trails than they do the state highways.
10.    The back door to your camp is a fridge door. Bonus points if you stock that fridge.
11.    The police backup in a high speed chase is the DNR.
12.    You only get channels 6 and 13, and you don't mind.
13.    Your camp lacks indoor plumbing and electricity because it's not necessary, but has a stockpile of beer and pork rinds.
14.    You know the four spots in the UP where you can't get "Da Bear".
15.    You run outside barefoot to check the mail - in February - and don't notice the cold.
16.    Your first cousins marry, and it doesn't seem out of the ordinary.
17.    Your class valedictorian is a logger.
18.    You have four or more broken down vehicles in your yard. Bonus points if they're snowmobiles.
19.    Your basic vehicle survival kit consists of blankets, pillows, a shovel, and rock salt.
20.    You get inspiration from the movie "Escanaba in da Moonlight" by Jeff Daniels.
21.    You think fine dining is a pasty and a Pabst.
22.    You have a bumper sticker that says "Say Ya To Da UP."
23.    Your school has an 8th grade graduation.
24.    You pay the taxes on your camp from the proceeds of beer can returns.
25.    You check your bank balance to see if you can afford to buy four pasties from the pasty sale this week.
26.    You make your own pasties, because who makes them better??? Nobody!!
27.    You plan your vacation around deer season.
28.    You use venison hamburger to make chili.
29.    Going up north means a hunting trip to Canada.
30.    Your neighbor plows your driveway and you pay him back with Yooper currency: a frozen lake trout from your freezer.
31.    You only own three spices - salt, pepper and ketchup.
32.    You design your Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit.
33.    You have more miles on your snowblower than your car.
34.    You have 10 favorite recipes for venison.
35.    Your TrueValue Hardware on any Saturday is busier than the toy stores at Christmas.
36.    You've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.
37.    Driving is better in the winter because the potholes get filled with snow.
38.    You think everyone from the city has an accent.
39.    You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons.
40.    You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car... or
41.    One of your cars is a Ski-Doo.
42.    Your snowblower gets stuck on the roof.
43.    You think the start of deer hunting season is a national holiday.
44.    Summer takes place the second week of July (and it still rains!!).
45.    You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
46.    You find -20°F a little chilly.
47.    The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freezer.
48.    You attended a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry and your snowmobile boots.
49.    Shoveling the driveway constitutes a great upper body workout.
50.    You know the four seasons: Winter, Still Winter, Almost Winter, and Construction.
51.    The municipality buys a Zamboni before a bus.
52.    Your vocabulary includes the following: da, dis, dat, dees, dem and deirs. Also included is the number "tree."
53.    You have a "camp," not a "cottage."
54.    You go "fishing out da camp."
55.    Your mosquito repellent doubles as your aftershave.
56.    You actually get these jokes, and forward them to all your Yooper friends.
Don't know what a Yooper is, eh? Well, first you have to go back to your 4th grade geography class and recall that Michigan is made up of two pennisulas connected by the Mackinac Bridge: a Lower Peninsula that looks like a mitten and an Upper Peninsula that kinda resembles a hunchback jumping rabbit.
No, the Lower Peninsula is NOT called the L.P. for some reason, which means people who hail from the Lower Peninsula are NOT called "Loopers." Instead, they're called "Trolls." They live under the bridge. (Think about it for a while if you don't get it at first. And if you still don't get it, ask someone nearby, that way they'll get to not only laugh at the joke but also at YOU for not getting it!) I'm also told that occasionally they're called "Flatlanders" because much of the Lower Peninsula is as flat as the Great Plains. But that's much more boring than being a Troll.
Source: http://ryansimmons.net/michifun/yooper.html


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