The Pasty Smuggling Ring

 

“You’ve got to go out on a limb sometimes,

because that’s where the fruit is.”

-Will Rogers

 

Tension was mounting at the secret government operation located behind the Mystery Spot in St. Ignace. Evan and Jenny worked undercover at local businesses such as the Mystery Spot, Mackinac Bridge, and the Truck Stop Restaurant in St. Ignace, Michigan. Their families agreed to keep their FBI employment a secret and told their friends in St. Ignace they returned to their hometown because they missed their family.  An illegal pasty smuggling ring, under investigation by the FBI, had all law enforcement personnel in the area on alert in search of any suspicious behavior. The FBI learned that pasties were being transported from the lower peninsula and were being dispersed all over Upper Peninsula and into the hands of people of all ages, including children. Part of the illegal activity included the making and selling of illegal pasties, pasties that were not made in the Upper Peninsula. The businesses were claiming the pasties were made in the U.P. Pasties were discovered as a handy food item for miners a long time ago. They were meat pies surrounded by a crust which usually included potatoes and rutabagas. The goal of the secret government mission was to preserve the integrity and authenticity of U.P. businesses selling pasties.

    The Mystery Spot served as the perfect spot for the secret government building which provided the FBI with a top secret meeting facility. The building was located behind the world renown tourist attraction known for its optical illusions. It was hidden in the woods. A large building built of bricks to withstand the wet weather. The building did not get a lot of sun, hidden amongst a heavy growth of trees. A two-track dirt road led to the secret hide out. The road looked like any of the roads traveled by people who enjoyed traveling by four wheelers all over the scenic U.P. The large building had offices, meeting rooms and a place for people to sleep when they came from out of town or they worked on projects in the area. Jenny and Evan stayed at the building and drove older all terrain jeeps so they did not stand out from the rest of residents.

    Evan enjoyed his part time job at the Mystery Spot. He fit into the Upper Peninsula’s Yooper persona. He had long dark hair that was tied back with a ponytail, had a beard and wore flannel plaid shirts, t-shirts and blue jeans. Evan was born and raised in St. Ignace and knew a lot of the locals. He went away to college to fulfill his desire to work in law enforcement.  He sought employment with the FBI after fulfilling a role as the local sheriff in another U.P. town. He had an eye for picking out suspicious characters and solved many crimes in his previous position. He built a name for himself when he worked closely with the FBI on many cases. He considered his current job, his dream job. Solving the crime of the decade and saving the Upper Peninsula (U.P.) pasty business was of the utmost importance.

    Jenny had a similar background. She was also born and raised in St. Ignace. Took a similar path of going away to college and working in Marquette as a City Police Officer. She ended up working with the FBI on many occasions to solve high profile cases. Jenny also fit the U.P. persona. She was tall and lean, had freckles and brown hair.  She wore her hair long and it was tied back in a ponytail.  She wore t-shirts, flannel shirts and jeans. She could hunt deer with the best of the hunters in the area. She also built a name for herself so when she applied to join the FBI, they welcomed her with open arms. Her heart went out to the U.P. businesses that tried to sell locally made pasties. “People need to be told the truth,” was one of her favorite sayings. She hated lies. It was discovered that people were entering local establishments in pairs from the lower peninsula to sell pasties saying they were from the U.P. Their pasties were tasty, so the authenticity of the goods was not questioned.

    Jenny and Evan traveled to Marquette to locate the address listed on the billing statement provided to the businesses that sold the pasties in question. The address was the location of an automobile body repair shop. The owners of the shop never heard of the pasty business. Their phones were tapped, and they were under surveillance. These efforts proved they were telling the truth. Businesses ordered additional pasties by using a webpage or leaving a message at a phone number with the 906 area code. The business owners were told to leave a business name, address and the number of pasties they wanted to purchase. The business owners thought they were busy, that’s why they had to use that method to order additional pasties. The pasty company underpriced other pasty providers.

 

    Jenny and Evan met at Bentleys, a favored local restaurant, to discuss their plans.

    “I want the fish sandwich and a pop,” said Evan to the waitress.

   “I will have the same,” said Jenny.

    “We should be having a pasty, but I have been eating so many to compare that I am getting tired of them.,” said Jenny.

    “I never get sick of pasties. So far, they are all tasting the same to some degree. I haven’t tasted one that raised my radar, yet.”

    “I haven’t either.”

    “When are we holding our stake out at the Mackinac Bridge again?” asked Jenny.

    “I think we need to be at the bridge tonight. It’s Thursday night. Before the weekend. We may spot some suspicious activity,” replied Evan.

    “I will meet you at the regular spot?” asked Jenny.

    “Yes, meet me at the bridge look out.”

    The townsfolk thought Jenny and Evan were dating. They went to high school together and were in the same grade. He played the role of a jock who happened to be a closet book worm and she was openly a book worm. She hated jocks when she attended high school. He did not get any of her attention. They were seen together a lot lately and everyone thought there was a romance brewing. It was a small town and the long-time residents liked watching the relationship grow. Some of them were bold enough to ask if wedding bells were in their future. They really didn’t know how they felt about each other. They were too busy working lots of hours at their part-time jobs and doing surveillance, which kept them tied up for hours each day. Jenny and Evan discovered they had a lot in common. They both liked hunting deer, hiking in the woods and fishing. The perfect ingredients for a successful relationship.

    “I have to get to work. Working as a maintenance worker for the Mackinac Bridge Authority provides me with an opportunity to see a lot of people as they cross the bridge. I have to clean windows today outside. Perfect opportunity for me to see people crossing. Keep your ear plug in just in case I have to reach you.” Evan preferred working at the Mystery Spot but the Mackinac Bridge job afforded better opportunities to spy on people coming from the lower peninsula. At the Mystery Spot he got to fool people by rolling a ball up an elevated platform with ease, having people sit on chairs or stand on walls and lean out like they were floating and how they looked taller than one another when they stood on cement platforms.  A wife would appear taller than her husband. It was a fun place to work. Only one of them was able to work at this location to be close to the government building and he drew the lucky straw. 

    “I will keep my ear plug in. My work at the Truck Stop gives me plenty of opportunity to spy on people who travel from the lower peninsula,” said Jenny. Jenny was settling into her job at the restaurant. She felt some of the truckers could be crude and offensive. She considered the source and did not try to place too much importance on their advances. Both Jenny and Evan did what a lot of St. Ignace residences did to get by, work a variety of jobs to make ends meet. No one knew what they did before they returned to St. Ignace.

    They both climbed into older jeeps and headed to their jobs. Smiling and waving at each other as they departed their parking spaces. Betsy, one of the Bentley waitresses, watched them leave. She was a long-time St. Ignace resident. She smiled and told Sally about what she saw. They had a wager going about how long it would take for them to get married. Betsy thought it would be a year and Sally thought within six months. They kept checking out Jenny’s stomach to see if there was a bun in the oven. Both Sally and Betsy had to get married.

    The Truck Stop was especially busy today, the weekend before the famous car show the end of June. Jenny was watching and listening as she served the customers. One of the customers got her attention. He was talking about pasties and how he was traveling to a town further north to make a delivery. Jenny headed to the kitchen to tell Evan through their ear buds. At the same time, Evan spotted people traveling north with lots of coolers sitting on the back seat of the car. He took out his binoculars and took down the license plate number. They looked suspiciously guilty, like they were looking for the police. Things were happening fast. He called in the license plate number to the main office.

     Evan’s phone rang soon after he sent it in. It was George from the main office.

    “Hello. What did you find out George?” asked Evan.

    “The number you called in belonged to a man named Ethan Edwards, who was brought in for smuggling illegal souvenirs into the U.P. last year. He had alibis for the times he was suspected of delivering the goods so they could not pin the illegal activity on him. I wouldn’t put it past him concerning the illegal pasties and fudge. People had made a lot of money selling pasties and fudge in the U.P. for many years. He probably wants to make a profit, too. We put out an alert and will have him located and followed.  We had a tracking unit attached to the bottom of their vehicle last year when they were under suspicion. They should be easy to locate if he has the same vehicle,” said George.

    “I can’t believe we finally have leads. Jenny overheard a conversation at the Truck Stop.”

    “She plans on watching them when they leave to take down their vehicle information.”

    “Do you think there are more than one person involved in this smuggling?” asked Evan.

    “It wouldn’t surprise me. There’s money to be made in the pasty and fudge business.”

     George gave Evan the information about the possible location of the criminal. Evan entered the information into his phone.

    “I am going to pick you up and we are headed to a place where the smugglers may be,” said Evan to Jenny.

    “I just phoned in the license number of the man I overheard talking about delivering pasties. I got an earful about how this man was associated with a possible illegal souvenir ring. “

    “George gave me the same information about the man I saw crossing the bridge with coolers on his back seat. I think they may be working together. I think we are finally going to break this case and be able to turn our focus on other cases,” said Evan.

    “I sure hope so. We owe it to the people who lived in the U.P. all their lives to be represented by people who only make the pasties in the U.P. You know my motto.”

    “I know. People must be told the truth.”

    Evan picked up Jenny at the Truck Stop and they headed to where the tracking device led them to near the small town of Trout Lake. They called for backup while they headed toward a dirt road in the middle of nowhere, the middle of the woods. They gave their coordinates, so they could be located.

    “I see a cabin with a light on over there,” Jenny said. She pointed to the far left of where they were driving.

    “I see it, too,” replied Evan.

    They parked the jeep in a small area near the side of the road and walked towards the cabin. They pulled their guns and walked as quietly as possible.

   Evan stepped on a twig and it sounded like it echoed throughout the woods. Jenny glared at him. He looked at her with an apologetic look. She motioned for him to walk behind her on the moss-covered ground. He followed her. They approached the cabin which appeared to be quiet and looked inside one of the back windows. They saw a light on in the front room and two men were sitting on a couch starring ahead. Evan and Jenny crept to the front of the cabin to look in. Both men were watching television and laughing at what they saw. It appeared to be a movie about the Three Stooges. Jenny frowned. She thought shows about ridiculous antics were below her. The two men did not look familiar to her. They were not at the Truck Stop earlier. They knocked on the front door and decided to pretend they were lost and were looking for the main road.

    “Hi, my name is John and this is Sally. We were out exploring some of the dirt roads and we can’t find our way back to the main road,” said Evan. Jenny tried to look forlorn and nervous.

    “Come in. We are just enjoying some tv before we turn in. We are hunters who come up here to hunt and explore the back woods,” said one of the men.

    “Can I use your bathroom. We’ve been on the road for a while?” asked Jenny.

    “Sure. It’s over there,” said the other man. He pointed down a hall.

    Jenny walked down the hall to the bathroom and while Evan was distracting them, she explored the back rooms and discovered coolers of pasties in one of the rooms. She motioned to Evan that she made the discovery. They planned on waiting for backup before the men were questioned.

    “How long have you been coming to this cabin?” asked Evan. Jenny looked at him surprised that she didn’t think of asking them the same question.

    “We’ve been coming here for years,” lied one of the men.

    “What do you hunt for?” asked Jenny. She wanted to find out if they knew where they were at and what people hunted for in the U.P.

    “We are hunting elk?” said one of the men.

    They fell for the trap. Elk are not hunted in the U.P.

    “Have you had any success?” asked Evan.

    “Yes, we bagged two last year,” lied the man.

    Just as the man got those words out, vehicles pulled up outside the cabin. The men looked at each other with a look of surprise. Other FBI officers and the sheriff’s department stormed into the cabin.

    “We have a warrant to search your cabin said one of the officers.”

    Jenny pointed to the back room and two of the men headed in the direction she pointed.  They called out that they found the pasties.

    “Give us your drivers’ licenses,” ordered Evan. They looked confused and angry at the same time.

    “I work for the FBI. and we have been on the trail of the smuggling of illegal pasties for a couple of years. We know that some of the businesses have been tricked into believing they were purchasing pasties made in the U.P. but they were actually made in the lower peninsula. The people in the U.P. deserve the truth and should not be swindled into thinking they are buying locally made goods,” said Gary, an FBI officer.

    The ID they provided had an address of Marquette, Michigan and the names on the ID’s were Ethan Edwards and Ely Goodman. Their fingerprints were taken, and it was discovered they had different names and came from a small town near Petoskey, Michigan. They broke and confessed that they have been selling pasties pretending they were made in the U.P. for a couple of  years and they told the officers they were a part of the phony U.P. souvenir racket. They folded and sat on the couch heavily like the world was lifted off their shoulders.

    “We really like the U.P. and we are sorry we tried to trick the people here. What’s going to happen to us?”

    “Passing off goods by false advertisement is a federal offense. You will at the very least be facing some heavy fines,” responded Gary.

   The night ended with hauling both men off to spend time in the St. Ignace jail pending their day in court. The pasties were confiscated as evidence. They also found some of the illegal souvenirs in same room where the pasties were stored.

 

    “I think things ended just the way they needed to end. We saved the reputation of the people of the U.P. and captured the culprits who were passing off goods that were not made in the U.P. Their business with the phony Marquette address has been closed down for good. We do good work, my friend,” said Evan as he tapped Jenny’s hand. They were sitting at their favorite restaurant eating an authentically made pastie.

    “This was a case against the trolls that live below the bridge and the Yoopers in the U.P. and we won,” exclaimed Jenny. Evan smiled back at her.

    “Why don’t you try ketchup on your pastie next time?” asked Evan.

    “No, thanks. I like salt and pepper.”

 

Disclaimer: Actual names of places and towns have been used. The characters and actions in this chapter are fiction. There is no secret government facility located behind the Mystery Spot in St. Ignace, Michigan.  Or is there? The author worked at the Mystery Spot when she was a teenager and enjoyed the experience. She remembers saying “You have heard of Isaac Newton’s theory, what goes up must come down. Not at the Mystery Spot” as she rolled a ball at what appeared to be up an elevated platform. The author was also aware of places of business that claimed the pasties they were selling, they made.  She felt that was false advertisement.